


Confidence (and how to get it)

by justiceandspiders



Series: yakulev week (2016) [5]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: College AU, M/M, Nightmares, also did i ever say i love lowkey putting other ships in, can u see that lowkey kagehina, hinata and lev are best buds ok, yaku is in his third year and lev's in his first
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-16
Updated: 2016-08-16
Packaged: 2018-08-09 05:00:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,519
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7787662
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/justiceandspiders/pseuds/justiceandspiders
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“If you’re worried about having another nightmare, you can just sleep here. It might help if you’re, you know, somewhere else? Or… With somebody else.”<br/>-<br/>Lev's growing increasingly worried about being the best for his team while Yaku tries to help him feel better.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Confidence (and how to get it)

**Author's Note:**

> day 5 / sleep

“Haiba, we’re sending you in.” The coach said as soon as he called Lev over to the bench. The current ace of the team was sent off after having a ball sent to his face, and it caused a nosebleed (which he insisted was fine, he could still play but the rest of the team wouldn’t hear any of it), so the next person chosen to replace him for the moment was Lev. He was only a first year on the college team, only having ever played in a select few practice matches so to be called up to play in this match was everything Lev had ever been waiting for!

“Really? I won’t let you down!” Lev watched as one of the managers carried the spiky-haired ace off the court. As he passed by, Bokuto moved the bloodied tissue from his nose to flash a toothy grin at Lev, at which the manager began to put the tissue back to his nose. 

“Don’t let me down, Haiba-kun!” He called as the manager whisked him away. Lev was feeling pretty confident at first, but as soon as those words came from Bokuto, from the guy he’s been looking up to ever since he started in college, his confidence started to falter. This was the guy who has brought the team to victory in almost every game, and Lev was supposed to be the one to fill his shoes now? 

He gave a smile to Bokuto as he was taken along to the infirmary, then looked up at the stands, where the hundreds of people were watching. Most here probably didn’t even know who Lev even was, and the look of confusion on the spectator’s faces almost made him want to go back to the side line. The team were also watching him, eyes like a hawk almost telling him he would never be as good as Bokuto.

Swallowing the lump forming in his throat, Lev caught the ball thrown at him, bouncing it on the floor a few times before taking a deep breath. He knew now that the eyes from everywhere in the gym were upon him, watching in silent judgement as he readied himself for the serve. What was the score again? Lev took a quick glance to the side. It was close; 23-24 to the opposite team. Bouncing the ball one final time against the floor, he threw it up into the air, running forward and hitting it with enough force to send it through.

And it did go over the net – thankfully – but as it flew through the air, the libero on the opposing team stood to the side, shouting “out!” as the ball hit the floor just outside of the line.

The disappointment Lev felt as the other team roared out loud in celebration, while his team’s shoulders slumped and the glint in their eyes disappeared was too much. He could just hear the sadness in Bokuto’s voice when he came back to see that the second set was lost all because of a stupid mistake that could have been easily avoided, and oh – the coach was for sure going to kick him off the team because why couldn’t he control his serves this far into the year and his upperclassmen were going to be so angry with him for messing up his first ever proper match and—

 

“—Leeeev!”

Lev was woken up abruptly by his short bundle of sunshine he’s been blessed with as a roommate shaking him awake, some sort of panic over his face. The taller boy sat up rubbing his head, Hinata sitting to the side of the bed.

“Lev! Finally you wake up – what’s wrong? You never wake up late and we’ve only got fifteen minutes until practice begins!”

“Oh, it was just… Eh?! Fifteen minutes? That’s barely enough time to have breakfast!” Lev jumped out of bed, almost knocking Hinata over in the process, but the boy managed to stand up and keep himself steady quick enough. Lev rushed towards his closet and took out his sports clothes, throwing them on the bed before taking a spare change for after practice. He grabbed his bag out from under the bed, putting the spare clothes inside and then changing into his gym clothes while Hinata sat back down on the edge of Lev’s bed with a slice of toast in his hands. “Didn’t you make me any toast? So mean--!”

“It’s on the side out there, Lev. But it’s probably getting cold now so I’d be quick!” The prompt from Hinata who was now shoving his own slice of toast into his mouth made Lev finish shoving all the necessary items into his bag, then picking it up to rush out of his room. On his way to the door, he picked up the slice of toast and opened the front door.

“Coming, Shouyou?” But Hinata was already behind him with his bag strapped on, waiting impatiently for Lev to open the door.

-

“It was the worst thing! Everyone was there and they were staring at me with these scary eyes and I felt like I was just being judged the entire time. And everyone just looked so disappointed with me, you know? All of our senpai’s looked at me like I just killed their family!” Lev said as he gripped onto the coffee resting on the table. 

Hinata sipped at his own drink as he listened to Lev’s nightmare. Practice today hadn’t gone so well for Lev today. His spiking practice was met with more misses than hits, when he was sent to practice blocks even more balls were hit through, and his serves… Thinking back on it only made Lev push the cup to the side while he threw his head down on the table.

The shorter of the pair was about to speak up when another voice came through, which made Lev sit up as soon as they began speaking. “Lev? Is- are you alright?”

Yaku had a takeaway cup with him along with a chocolate chip muffin. It seemed like he was in a rush to leave, but as soon as he saw the back of Lev’s head, he stopped completely. Hinata smiled at Yaku, standing up to allow Yaku to take the seat. “I think you’re just the person Lev wants to talk to, Yaku-san!” Hinata said, picking his cup up to down the rest of the drink, setting it back on the table and picking his bag up.

Yaku glanced at the door, then at Lev who looked as though he’d been pretty upset over something – and Yaku was certainly not one to just leave someone like this. As Yaku sat in the chair Hinata previously sat at, Hinata put a hand on Lev’s shoulder, squeezing gently before taking his leave. “I promised Tobio I would put some more practice in – I’ll see you later, Lev! Bye Yaku-san!”

Lev gave him a wave as he exited the coffee shop, as soon as the door closed behind him he turned his attention to Yaku, who seemed more concerned than anything. “Well?” Was all he said before taking a small sip of his coffee. The two hadn’t really seen much of each other since Yaku left school, though sometimes he and Kuroo would spend a visit to the team just to see how well they were getting on, and of course would watch the official matches whenever they came up. Once Lev came to the same college as Yaku, the two had made more of an effort to see each other – after all, they were able to see each other basically every day now, what with being in the same apartment complex and college.

“Ah, Yaku-san, it’s nothing, really. I just… Had a silly dream, is all! I don’t want to bother you with the details… It was just stupid! Nothing to worry about-!”

The more Lev mumbled on, the more Yaku just needed to know what was making him so clearly upset. He set the cup down, and placed both hands over the top of Lev’s. “Lev, that’s not going to make me any less worried. Tell me.”

Lev flexed his fingers out under Yaku’s hands, then pulled them back into his lap. “Well… It’s just… I had a dream that I messed up my first ever official volleyball game! And, and everyone hated me and Bokuto-san was so disappointed and the coach kicked me off the team and I wouldn’t be able to stay at the college anymore and my parents would think I’m just some kind of dropout and –“

“Jeez, Lev, okay! Okay, I get you.” He almost tried to lean over to reach for Lev’s hand again, but with the two coffees on the table and the fact his hands were hidden under the table in his lap made it hard, so he just sat still, fiddling with his sleeves. “What’s made you think like that? You’re a good player.”

It was true that in the almost four years that Lev had been playing volleyball, he’d improved vastly since his first year of high school. In his third year, he’d even earned the title of ace! But upon coming to college, things were definitely ten steps higher than in school. Most of his time now was spent upon volleyball, compared to back in high school where he only had two to three hours per day, five days a week. 

Lev just shrugged, moving his chair over slightly so he could lean his head against the wall. “I… I don’t know. I think I’m feeling a lot more pressure this year! Like, I want to be a regular but the rest of my teammates are so good, that I don’t know if I’ll ever become the ace I want to be again!”

“I watched your matches in your third year of school. You know the one before the nationals? It was against ah, Nohebi, wasn’t it? Anyway – I think back to the first time you played against them, and how your blocks wouldn’t keep out the balls, or your spikes still needed vast improvements. And then I think back to your third year, you must know how well you’ve improved since, don’t you?”

“Yeah, but-“

Yaku put a hand up as if to tell Lev he wasn’t done talking, and Lev looked down at his hands. “Oikawa-san is the regular setter for your team, isn’t he? And Bokuto-san, he’s a regular – and the ace. Do you think those two started off as regulars as soon as they joined the team?”

“Well, no…”

“Exactly. So just because you aren’t good enough yet, doesn’t mean you won’t be next year, or the year after.” 

Lev took his cup, swirling the coffee around for a moment before bringing it to his lips, the drink already going cold so he downed as much of it as he could. Slowly, he put the cup back down on the table, eyes fixed on the stirring stick left to the side of the cup. “But what if something happens, and I do end up playing this year? If I mess up my shot at proving to the team that I am capable to play, the – the next two years will be ruined!”

“Who said you’re going to fail? If you think you will, you may as well just quit now.”

“Yaku-san--!”

“No, it’s true. If you can’t believe in yourself, what point is there to continue? You want to make it as a regular, then you’re going to have to prove it. Now, are you going to mope about in a coffee shop or did you want to come back to my dorm? I need to finish an assignment first, but you’re welcome to stay with me.” And Yaku stood up, taking his half drunken coffee cup and muffin with him. On his way to the door, he turned, waiting for Lev to stand up and follow.

-

“Yaku-san.”

Yaku shook his head slightly, adjusting the laptop resting on his knees as he made the final touches to his essay - something about a book he had to read over the month.

“Yaku-saaaan.”

Yaku quickly saved the work, then skimmed through it for any spelling mistakes before closing the laptop down, setting it down beside him where he was sat on the bed. He looked over to Lev, who looked as though he was falling out of the desk chair he’d gone to as soon as they arrived at Yaku’s dorm. 

“Yaku-s—“

“Lev. I said I had to finish my assignment first. What did you want?”

Lev pushed himself off of the chair and walked over towards Yaku, where he sat down and leaned his head against the older boy’s shoulder, letting out a drawn-out sigh. “I was just wondering if you were done yet.”

“Well, I could’ve probably done with checking it through again, but I’m pretty sure I’m done. Did you want some dinner?”

“Mm… No. I think I want to get some sleep. Walk me out to the door?”

Yaku nudged Lev off his shoulder, reaching over to grab his laptop again so he could bring it over to his desk. Lev also stood up, stretching his long arms above his head. As Yaku turned back to Lev, he was not expecting to be met with the sight of his shirt lifting slightly, revealing only a small slither of skin, but he wouldn’t complain. The temptation however to tickle his sides as he had his hands up was too much, so he silently stood in front of him, and lightly ran his hands up and down the unsuspecting boy’s sides.

“Wha—Yaku!” He dropped his hands, wrapping his arms around himself tightly in an attempt to get Yaku to stop. He did anyway, at least, stop tickling him. He let his hands linger on Lev’s waist however. If Lev wanted him to stop, he certainly didn’t voice any complaints, though a faint blush appeared on his cheeks, and he looked down at the floor rather than at Yaku. “Uh – so I should just…”

“If you’re worried about having another nightmare, you can just sleep here. It might help if you’re, you know, somewhere else? Or… With somebody else.” Yaku suggested, his own cheeks turning the same colour as Lev’s.

“You mean, you wouldn’t mind if I slept here? With…” His cheeks were burning now as he thought about it. Yaku was seriously asking him to sleep over for the night? He nodded though, slowly at first, and with increased confidence he smiled, sitting down on the edge of the bed.

Yaku followed suit, then led down against the wall, opening his arms out for Lev to join him. Of course, he did, feeling just a little bit awkward about the whole thing. He was sure Yaku did as well, but as soon as he put his head against the pillow beside Yaku’s head, he relaxed. Yaku put his arm around Lev in a comforting manner, and as soon as the two made themselves comfortable, Lev closed his eyes.

**Author's Note:**

> ??? i don't know
> 
> wanna talk about yakulev? find me on tumblr at sylvanaswlndrunner


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